Something bothers me in the way I experience the now, and it’s the fact that I don’t fully experience it.

When I am doing something like a chore, or waiting for some event, or even putting my daughter to sleep, I am always anticipating what I should do next. This is not healthy. I’m not fighting for food, and I am privileged enough to have the space and time to live in the now.

Enjoying the present moment is highly underrated. We, as a society, feel that we’re losing something if we don’t entertain ourselves, consume something, or plan the future. Especially when our phone is just there in our pocket. We don’t need any of that. I think that is a wrongful mindset.

As I slowly heal and deal with my anxiety disorder, I notice the opportunity to relax and live in the present. This rarely happens, but it’s delightful. There is some clarity in the mind. The muscles relax. I feel the weight of the body, and its temperature lowers, understandably, with a calmer nervous system. I also get the benefit of a more creative spirit. I enjoy looking around more.

It’s difficult though, but I will look to get more of the benefits of living in the present, living in the moment. Because I can, and I’m grateful for that, and because that makes me a better person for me, myself and the society. Wasting those opportunities to live in the now is just a waste of energy.